Monday, July 08, 2024
It may seem counter intuitive that relationships are the hardest for people who come from a healthy, loving household.
Why?
When you come from a healthy home environment, you’re not expecting to find the worst in people and especially not a love interest.
But the reality is, when you get out there in these streets (lol) you’re put in the mix with everybody, including all the toxic mfers who knows not love. And you’re not expecting it. Thus, you’re entering the connection/relationship completely blind. And you naturally start out the connection giving a genuine and pure form of love, respect and common decency.
Meanwhile, those toxic mfers are expecting the worst from everybody and will play that out with you by being inconsistent and destructive. While you continue to love them not knowing what is wrong or what you’re doing wrong.
Essentially, it boils down to you wasting more time dating the wrong mfers or healing from heartbreak versus a woman who is more savvy to the game.
Trust me, you’ve seen this shit play out in your real life. Just think about all the women you know who got married first or can secure a man lickitty split. It’s usually the toxic bitches or those coming from unstable households lol. Obviously, not everyone as many women and men from the more extremely toxic environments tend to not follow the traditional societal traditions and have completely bypassed the desire or dream of being married.
I know a couple of the girls I grew up with who bounced around from place to place with their mothers (who usually schooled them on the toxicity of men) had no problem getting men to commit to them. But the number one demographic of women who reach out to me are from two parent households with loving parent dynamics as backwards as it may seem. But with a deeper analysis, it makes complete sense, since their radar isn’t naturally tuned into detecting the UNEXPECTED wolfs hiding in sheep’s clothing, cough the “honorable” dads, who will always put their kids and baby mama before you, the so-called nice guys, or the men that think it’s a compliment to ask women to do favors for them as a way of hitting on her (just completely and utterly delusional mfers). Or how about the crippled (not just physical) men society force women into accepting, or the mfers who only like women who despise them -so as soon as you fall back, here comes their toxic ass!
Why do you think the Lauren Sanchez’s, and the Marjorie Harvey’s, etc can bag these rich men. Put me in a room with Bill Gates or any of these mfers and I could walk out with them, hand in hand and it has nothing to do with having sex with them. But I wouldn’t do it since a superficial connection is not what I desire, not saying their connection is superficial, but it would be for me if that was my sole mission in doing it.
When you’ve had to survive through various hard knocks, you learn how to be savvy in the ways that will enhance your life the most. Men are notorious for this too, don’t think it’s just women. Just look at the 90 day fiancee type shows and, the games men play with women simply because they were burned once and have now chosen to be jaded for the rest of their lives.
That is the thing that parents must teach their children who are growing up in a completely different family dynamic and environment than themselves (a more balanced, loving and financially stable environment). At some point they must teach their children the tough lessons they had to learn. Otherwise, the streets or these toxic males will be the teacher. I consider this all the time. Like, at what point do I start to teach my 2 year old daughter about the principles of Women Lead Men Follow and why it’s effective. Maybe middle school, high school. I don’t know the answer yet.
Of course there are viable ways to filter out some of the degenerates from the get-go, that way securing a loving commitment is a lot easier. You can do this by going to college, or having a higher level job or career where you interact with more upper echelon men. These men are more than likely coming from loving households as well and are less likely to play the toxic games as those coming from a survival background. But there are some bad seeds there too, but more than likely not as much as the men in these streets or dating apps. This is why having high standards and being selective with who you date is a must!
Other buffers are being introduced to your beau by family members and friends. Y’all may frown at the traditional Indian arranged marriages, which of course does have many flaws such as marrying off young girls to despicaple, old fucks or using it strictly as a monetary means. HOWEVER, for the families who are actually looking out for the best interest of their children in all ways, there is much to be said about having an arranged marriage.
Arranged marriages creates a really advanced vetting process with many familial buffers annotating if the person is the right fit. I actually like that. Back in the day it was the tradition for the male suitor to show up to the woman/girl’s house bringing flowers for her and her mother and sitting down to have a conversation with her father about his intention, from date 1. With so many broken families, nomadism, women going into the workforce and becoming more independent these traditions have become a thing of the past. However, they were the backbone of the courting process and what made so many commitment of the past work almost effortlessly, without women being in this incessant place of limbo waiting for degenerate males to commit. This is why learning the lost art of Women leading, men following is so incredibly important for women. And I’m just the right person to teach it, I’m firm, assertive, no-bullshitting yet I still value the traditional courting efforts by men and the core values of love, romance and respect in a relationship.
So again, it is not what you know that is causing you problems, but what you don't know.
The other spectrum that is more like who I am is seeing and knowing both sides of the coin, the love and the toxicity which ironically creates a justified balance (the place to be). Not expecting the worst, yet being savvy and ready for any games these toxic mfers are coming with. Basically, identifying their bullshit before any feelings are developed. This, I had to learn and develop over time, as they use to get my ass too lol.
Also, you must learn to not let these toxic mfers make you become jaded or like them, giving up on love and happiness to instead live a bitter and tit for tat lifestyle. Thus, hurting yourself and others. Do not go that route or entrap yourself in that mindset. I’ve been there, done that myself, and let me tell you, it is ALWAYS, ALWAYS better on the loving side. That is where joy resides, happiness, and the endless supply of Universal gifts. It is the place where healthy, loving, heartfelt relationships reside.
If you come from a healthy family dynamic, it’s time to wise up and start your savvy dating journey being aware of the bullshit these “know not love” men are coming with.
And the best part, you can learn it for free via my free amazon book. Women Lead Men Follow: The Wrong Mr. Right
I wrote this book and decided to give it away for free because I only wanted to focus on the best part of dating and relationships in my community. The fun parts, the how to get the gifts, and the dreamy guy to ask you out, the love, the romance, the commitment you want on YOUR timeline while HE proposes and courts you.
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Until next time!
Sim
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As Always:
Your Bff,
Simone
LEADING DATING & RELATIONSHIP EXPERT
Hey there, I'm Simone, your premier dating expert at Women Lead Men Follow, dedicated to empowering women to lead the way to marriage on their timeline, while he takes the step to propose.
With over a decade of proven success and a degree in Family Science, I've guided women aged 25 to 54 to effortlessly achieve their dream relationships and experience that magical proposal moment.
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Tuesday, October 01, 2024
Sunday, September 22, 2024
Learn the Ultimate Secret to Having Your Dates HAPPILY Shower You with Gifts, Even if They've Never Done It Before!
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